Putting A Negative/Positive Spin On Traits

A lot of us are guilty for putting a negative spin on things, in particular when it comes to judgements about other people. I’ve frequently seen criticisms along the lines of ‘they’re trying too hard’ or ‘taking life too seriously.’ It’s possible to perceive almost everything in a positive or negative way. Some people will probably fit our negative view of them, others the positive, but many will be somewhere in-between. Many of us are fearful of being branded with certain criticisms like it’s the worst thing ever, but in our avoidance we also miss out on the positives of these traits. For example, there are worse things a person can be than pretentious, but I see the word being bandied about frequently as something to be absolutely avoided. I think such words are possibly being misused and have seen it being applied to anybody with an interest in art or academics (see the article ‘What’s wrong with being pretentious?‘ on The Guardian and ‘It’s good to be pretentious‘ on Salon.)

We might have things we dislike about ourselves (perhaps we were bullied about it,) but we can learn to accept it by putting a positive spin on it. Even in the worst parts of ourselves it’s possible to see something good. That’s not to suggest that we should become complacent with who we are (it’s good to work on ourselves to become better people,) but it doesn’t help to constantly beat ourselves up over something that might not even be that big of a problem; We’re all fallible human beings after all. Seeing everything in a negative light also contributes to problems like depression and anxiety.We can use this trick to answer interview questions in which we’re asked about our weaknesses too.

By taking the time to interpret something in multiple ways, we can come to the realization of just how unclear life really is and that there is always more than one way to see something. As such we can draw the conclusion that no matter what we do it’s impossible to please everybody and that misunderstandings are likely. Somebody might act in a way that we consider to be incredibly grating, but to others it’s endearing or beneficial. Trying to see another’s behaviour as something other than a threat to ourselves can also help us to deal with them more easily or perhaps allow us to get along better.

  • Workaholic/Dedicated
    • This person is taking life too seriously. They need to learn to chill out more.
    • This person aspires to do great things. They’re consistent and reliable.
  • Gullible/Trusting
    • This person is so gullible, they’ll fall for anything.
    • This person is incredibly trusting and that is a rare thing. They respect people by taking them at their word and it’s unfair to take advantage of this.
  • Sensitive/Empathetic
    • Some people are just too sensitive and should toughen up.
    • These people are empathetic and sensitive towards others feelings. It can be a good thing to question what we’re willing to find acceptable in our lives. Many sensitive people are actually quite brave for standing their ground on how they’re willing to let others treat them.
  • Lazy/Playful
    • All these people do is play around all day. They’re constantly making light of serious situations. Time for them to buckle down and get on with some work.
    • Playful people can be more creative and easy-going.
  • Critical/Analytical
    • This person is constantly nit-picking and fault finding. It can put a downer on things and isn’t fun to be around. They’ll never be happy with anything you do.
    • This person has standards. They’re not afraid to offer suggestions if it means making things better. There are times when a sugar-coated version of things simply won’t do.
  • Opinionated/Passionate
    • This person is constantly forcing their own opinions on you, it gets tiresome.
    • Offering a passionate viewpoint can mistakenly be taken as being opinionated. These people are able to stand their ground and make their wishes known.
  • Dreamer/Aspiring
    • This person has their heads up in the clouds. They’re not being realistic and need to come back down to earth.
    • These people are full of dreams and always aspiring to soar as high as they can. Why would we want to lose the dreams in which we can fly?
  • Negative/Realistic
    • This person puts a downer on things all the time. They’re always trying to tell you what you can’t do.
    • They’re being realistic and helping us to keep our feet on the ground. If we’re not careful we can set our hopes to high just to come crashing down later.
  • Loud/Out going
    • This person is always in your face and wants to be the centre of attention.
    • These people are bubbly and lively. They’re friendly and can be fun to hang around with.
  • Heavy going/Deep
    • Some people need to learn how to switch off. They’re tiring to be around all the time because they’re so intense.
    • These people are deep, methodical thinkers that can find interesting thoughts where others do not. While to one person it can seem intense and heavy going, to another it can feel just as dull or agitating having to switch off for long periods of time.
  • Competitive/Ambitious
    • I often see the word competitive being used as a negative thing. People striving to be good at something to make others feel bad. Sometimes these people can come across as tying too hard. Comparing ourselves to others is no good for our self-esteem.
    • Some people are ambitious and enjoy a challenge. The banter can be fun and helps you to blow off steam. Competing with others can help us to push ourselves to be the best we can be, otherwise we’d just get complacent. It can help to toughen us up too.
  • Anti-social/Quiet
    • Some people are really shy or can seem a bit aloof.
    • In a world full of noise it can be good to appreciate silence every once in a while. These people can also make great listeners. In the case of being an introvert it’s just a different social preference; I prefer less but closer friendships; I like to really get to know people and we’re not all good at small talk.
  • Selfish/Strong-willed
    • This person only ever thinks about themselves. They can come across as being pushy and uncompromising.
    • They’re decisive and can stand their ground. In this world you don’t always have a choice but to put your own needs first, otherwise you’ll end up missing out. We shouldn’t feel guilty for putting ourselves first every once in as while.
  • Bossy/Determined
    • These people are controlling and constantly telling others what to do.
    • They care about the outcome of something or only want the best for us. In some situations a person has no choice but to be bossy, if their head is on the line and trust isn’t getting the required results. Some of us need a little push to get the best out of ourselves.
  • Self-righteous/Virtuous
    • These people go around telling others how to be instead of minding their own business. They can seem judgemental.
    • They’re concerned about the principles or right and wrong and want to uphold positive behaviour. While it might be misguided at times, it isn’t always done with ill intent.
  • Immature/Carefree
    • These people never seem to grow up and take responsibility for themselves. They’re always making light of serious situations and it can be disrespectful.
    • They haven’t grown up too quickly and some child-like qualities can be endearing (being an adult isn’t always great.) They don’t see the need to get upset over things they can’t control and prefer to try and cheer people up.
  • Interfering/Involved
    • This person is constantly interfering in my life instead of just letting me get on with it.
    • This person really cares and is invested in us.
  • Naive/Jovial
    • Overly positive and happy people are naïve as they don’t see the world for what it really is. They can seem unsympathetic as they’re not able to acknowledge the suffering in others.
    • They want to bring light and joy to an otherwise cruel world. Life is too short to worry about things all the time and they want to enjoy themselves while they’re alive. When they lecture us on positivity it’s not to make us feel bad, but because they don’t like seeing others getting upset.

There will be many I haven’t thought of here, feel free to add your own to the comments below.

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About wallcat

I have a strong passion for computing. In particular programming for which I am able to use a variety of languages including C++, Visual C#, Blitz Basic, Actionscript 2.0, Python and Lua. I also enjoy web-design and have some knowledge of HTML/CSS, PHP/SQL and Javascript. As well as programming I have a strong background in art and enjoy drawing in my spare time. When I’m not sat at my computer I like to keep fit by going to the gym or using my exercise ball.

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  1. “You’re Too Sensitive” | My Inner Geek - April 4, 2016

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